Showing posts with label family story. Show all posts
Showing posts with label family story. Show all posts

Sunday, April 4, 2010

APPY EAST!

Thats how all the old Sicilian ladies in my family say Happy Easter. APPY EAST!
And if the celebration happens to be on Long Island, where all New Yorkers tend to move, Nonna will say, "Jane, fah east, I go to long aye." (Jen, for Easter, I am going to Long Island.)

PASQUA 2010  
A CASA ASARO 
MENU’ 

Antipasti: 
- Sfincione Siciliano 
- Caponata 
- Olive, Salame & Pane 

Primi: 
- Lasagne alla Palermitana 
- Involtini di Melenzane ripieni di Capellini 

Secondi: 
- Carne mista alla brace (salsiccia, agnello, 
pollo, ecc) 

Contorni: 
- Insalata di Delizie Primaverili 
- Funghi ripieni 
- Kish di Zucchine 

Dolci: 
- Gelato 
- Torta alle Mandorle e Olio d’Oliva 
Bevande: 
- Prosecco, Vino Bianco, Vino Rosso, Acqua 
San Pellegrino, Espresso, Caffe’ Americano, 
Amaro, Zibibbo. 


PS. This Event is BYOC 
(Bring Your Own Chair) 

Friday, April 2, 2010

We already screwed up Easter...

...And its only Good Friday
   Our cousin Francesca was nice (and crazy) enough to invite the Galatiotos to her house this Easter Sunday. With all of our antics (well Nonna's) my mom Marcy just keeps saying, "that poor girl is never going to invite us over there ever again!" If she is smart she won't. We have a way of taking a nice day and whirl winding it into a maniacal affair. And its all Nonna's fault.
    Fra sent out this huge Sicilian menu. I am stoked! And there are a lot of people coming, so we are each assigned a menu item and have been instructed to bring our own chair. Easy enough, right? Not when you throw an 89 year old Sicilian lady in the mix, who may not be up to the task, but will feel the weight of God on her soul if she does not make the lasagna. Lasagna is not easy and every holiday Nonna looks like she is about to keel over after she makes it. We all tell her not to make it but secretly want her to because its so good. So of course, for Easter Nonna says, "No! I'm gonna makeh the lasagna!" 
    Marcy: "Mama, its too much work."
    Rocco: "Ma, don't make the lasagna."
    Nonna: "No! I'm gonna makeh the lasagna."
   A call to Francesca, "Nonna is making the lasagna." Fra so graciously accepts the offer. Probably a relief because its such a pain, to boil that slippery pasta, then make the meat sauce, layer it all together and don't forget the bechamel sauce. 
    Then Nonna's crazy switch goes off, "No! I don't wanna makeh the lasagna."
    There is no explanation. We don't get it. Marcy is so embarrassed that I get a call. 
    My response, "Fra doesn't care. Just tell her Nonna is old and crazy!"
    "Jen, can you text Fra that Nonna doesn't want to make the lasagna."
    This is how my parents get out of it because they supposedly cannot text. I mean Marcy still can't work the VCR, but its still a lame excuse. I text Fra because I am resigned to the craziness. I am so conditioned to it that if everything went smoothly I would think something is wrong.
    Of course Fra understands, she grew up in Sicily, the crazy old lady capital of the world. But you think we would be able to leave it alone, right? Of course not.
     Nonna, who makes an art out of driving my dad more insane than he already is says, "Rocco, no! I am making the ziti!"
      Ziti is not on the menu. And she is not making enough for everyone, just one tray. For over twenty people. It makes no sense. Nod and smile. 
     I go to my parents this morning and Rocco, while working on his laptop (but he can't text) says, "Jen I can only see you on weekends from now on. Your mother and I are getting a divorce! Don't talk to me until tomorrow."
     This is all about the ziti and whether they should drive Fra even more nuts with this new development. They are actually fighting about this. Rocco is writing a crazy email to Fra, while my mother (the only sane person in our family) is saying and I (half sane) agree, "Just leave it alone! We have already made such a mess. She is never going to invite us over there again!"
     But Rocco, just like Nonna, insists, "No! I am sending it to her!"


And here it is, the crazy email:

Subject: PASCQUA (Easter)


"Bellezza, (gorgeous)

Mia madre ha trovato le forze di fare un po di ziti. Che ci puoi fare, pazianza.
(My mother found the strength to make a little ziti. What can you do? Patience.)

Vuole fare 'na tigghia.
(She wants to make one tray.)

Chiedo scusa e perdono da parte di mia madre che ha volte puo' rompere
le balle pure a quelli che  ce l'hanno d'acciaio.

(I ask your pardon for my mother who has the ability of breaking balls made of steel.)

Mi dispiace.
(I am sorry.)

ROCCO

PS

Marcy e' cosi  mortificata che non ha potuto scriverti.
(Marcy is so mortified that she is not able to write to you.)
Di nuovo, scusa.
(One more time, sorry.)
Rocco, il rappista fallito.
(Rocco, the failed rapper.)
--
Rocco G. Galatioto"

Happy Easter!!!

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

BUON COMPLEANO NONNA! Some more Sicilian craziness...

Happy 89th Birthday, Nonna! And another one, and another one, and another one...
Last year at this time, Nonna was in bad shape, in the hospital and we weren't sure she was going to make it through the holidays. But she has that Sicilian fight in her, and she is alive and spunky today and we are truly grateful, even though she doesn't exactly share that sentiment.
We took Nonna out to London Lennies, the best seafood restaurant in NYC which happens to be in the Queens hood. Top notch meal and top notch service.
It was a lot of crazy Galatioto Family fun, which culminated in the entire restaurant singing "Happy Birthday" to Nonna over a giant piece of cheese cake. Nonna's wish after she blew out the candles: "Natrannu un vulissi esseri essei 'cca" or "Next year I don't want to be here."
"Don't worry, Mama," Uncle Sal screamed across the table, "next year, we'll take you to Joe Abbraciamento's," (That's an all Italian joint up the block.) He knew full well she wasn't talking about the restaurant.
Claire, my bestest friend and our waitress was concerned.
"Was the service bad?" she asked.
"No, Claire, next year Nonna wants to be dead," I said.
And this is why Sicilians are insane. I rest my case.

Saturday, December 5, 2009

Its 10pm (and snowing) do you know where your mutandine are?

You may be asking yourself WTF is mutandine? If you are asking this question, I am guessing you don't have a Sicilian Nonna. Mutandine or as I pronounce (moo-tun-dee-nee), is basically any undershirt and if you're from any of the outer boroughs you may refer to it as a stickball shirt or a wife beater.
As a child you did not go to Sunday dinner at Nonna's, even during a heat wave, without your mutandine. It was as if the mutandine possessed some magical powers that fought off the common cold and the evil eye.
Nonna had a keen sense about the mutandine. If I wore it, she subtly nodded in approval. But if not she gave me a horrified look then grab at my torso, rustling my clothes hysterically.
"Jane, you notta wear you mutandine? Jane, you goin' to catch cold."
Working up a sweat in the middle of the summer I would try to assure her that I would be okay.
"No! Jane you needa the mutandine."
So she would fish out one of Nonno's (that's my grandpa's) mutandine, a great big mutandine that fit me like a dress, so I looked like one of the chipmunks and I'd put my smaller outside shirt over it.
Looking like a fool, Nonna would calm down. Better to look like a fool than be struck with a fever in the middle of July. Satisfied, she would bring me to the table for a nice big bowl of my favorite pasta, which was plain with some olive oil.

Thursday, October 15, 2009

The Other Brooklyn

     I am from Queens, (let this be clear) but when my grandparents came here from Sicily, they first settled in Brooklyn, in Bushwick to be exact. And Rocco went to Bushwick High School when it wasn't cool to live in Bushwick. Very not cool. I remember this awesome orange Bushwick HS Reunion T Shirt he used to have. Beacon's Closet would pay big bucks for that one these days.
    Back in the day there was a funny phrase that distinguished two different areas of Brooklyn. If you lived in the northern area, where Knickerbocker Avenue is, where a lot of Italian immigrants lived, you lived in "Brooklyn." Then there was, "The Other Brooklyn," way over in the South part of the borough, which referred to Italian neighborhoods like Bensonhurst and Bay Ridge. Nonna still says, "He lives in l'altro Brukulino." On the other hand, if you lived in Bensonhurst, you considered that to be "Brooklyn" and you called Bushwick, "The Other Brooklyn." Its all a matter of one's perspective.
    Like when I was a kid on the block in Queens I had a friend named Jen. I called her "Jennifer Down the Block," to distinguish her from myself who was "Jennifer Up the Block." When I called her "Jennifer Down the Block" one day she said, "No, you are Jennifer Down the Block!"
We  still have not resolved that one.

Thursday, October 8, 2009

NONNA PIZZA - LOVE LEARNED

     Its one of those things I always said I wanted to do: learn how to make pizza the way Nonna's been slinging them since before I grew teeth. Nonna's pizza is what can I say: Nonna's pizza. Its so distinct in flavor, so consistent over my twenty eight years, and always gives me that warm "I am loved" feeling when I bite into it. The dough is super nutty, oily and crunchy at the same time. The toppings are simple, the perfect combination of sauteed onions, fresh tomato and cheese, plus a little oregano. Its just perfect and all love.
    Nonna is 88 years old, although sometimes she says she 89, and when the arthritis kicks in and she is asking God to take her, she's 90. 
    "You know Jane (my name is Jen), yo Nonna issa 90 yees old." 
    And even so, when I asked her to teach me to make pizza, she rolled up her sleeves and led the way. I know it was hard for her. She has such pain in her hands that they literally go stiff. Trust me she had no problem complaining about that, either. 
   "This issa lotta work, Jane."
   "I know Nonna, let me do it," I said.
   "No, you can't do it."
   She says the same thing when I ask her to teach me crocheting or sewing or any other skill little old Sicilian ladies rock out on. 
   Second to complaining about the arthritis, she loves complaining about my brother Mike. How he leaves the lights on in the hallway and does laundry in the middle of the night and smokes cigarettes. He lives there, in her 3 family house in Queens, in my old apartment, and she rides him. At one point while kneading the dough, her little old Sicilian lady senses alerted her to Mike outside. He was actually keeping an eye on an injured pigeon in the driveway, which is a funny detail. Well, she stopped working that dough, went out on the balcony and started yelling at him about the bad way he put the garbage out, mixing the regular trash with the recyclables. Old people are obsessed with recycling.
   But as long as Nonna is complaining we are happy because its the sign that she is alive and kicking. Its not when she is complaining about her failed health at the age of 88 that we rush her to the hospital. Its when she stops complaining that we know something is seriously wrong.
   This pizza we made together really taught me about love. All that hard work that goes into it, which no one in our family sees or cares about. We just enjoy the fruits of her labor then we all go back for seconds and thirds and fourths our whole life. When you see the effort she puts in, the thankless hours of kneading the dough and making the sauce, without as much gratitude as, "Nonna, this is good," then you see what selfless love is. Its giving without getting anything back. And giving over and over just to give just because that is how you love.
   Now down to the technical pizza making process. This is a true Grandma slice. Better than anything you can get in a restaurant because its infused with Nonna love.
   Nonna has this gigantic board she puts on the table when making dough is involved. Its actually a mismatched piece of cabinet from when she redid her kitchen 8,000 years ago. Onto this board she put, oh about that much flour and made a well in the middle. There are no measurements with Nonna, even in baking. Everything is "ad'occhio" or "to the eye."
   As far as the flour is concerned, this was a major problem because I brought the wrong kind. It was some weird "Whole Wheat White Flour" from Trader Joe's. Nonna was not happy. And my yeast in the little packet, oh no, she scoffed at it and went into her freezer and pulled out some crazy frozen gummy yeast she picked up at some pizzeria. She boiled some water, let it cool, then dissolved the yeast blob in that. Then she started mixing the yeast mixture and the water into the flour. The whole mixing into the flour took a while. She kept moving it all around and scraping bits up from the board and slowly adding warm water a little at a time. I would say all in all she added about 3-4 cups of water. Then she began kneading the dough, which she did for a good 20 minutes. 

    After a while she made three dough balls and set them up in the back room on the couch layered in towels and topped off with a knitted blanket. They were so cute in there, all wrapped up. I took a nap while the dough was rising. 
    There is nothing like a nap in Nonna's ornate living room, with the Italian television blasting and Nonna having a full on conversation in Sicilian with me, discussing things like how the lady across the streets is trying to steal her "caretaker" Josephine away from her. The drama of being a little old Sicilian lady.
   Finally it was time for the dough to be rolled out. I'd say she let it rise for like an hour and a half. She oiled a pan and started spreading the dough into it. Meanwhile she sauteed some onions. She spread some fresh tomatoes on the dough, along with some "fresh cheese" like prima sale and some grated cheese. They she layered the onions on top and coated everything in more oil and fresh oregano. Into the oven for about 20-30 minutes. When they were almost done she opened the oven and layered mozzarella on top and let that melt. Finally it was pizza time. 
   The dough was weird. Not bad, only not the usual consistency. What is funny is the whole thing did not taste like how Nonna's pizza usually tastes. I realized later why that was so. When I was scarfing it down the next day is when it tasted like Nonna's pizza. All the oil and flavors by then had soaked into the crust to create this chewy, oily, cheesy focaccia-like deliciousness, which also made our flour choice irrelevant. I had never been there when that pizza was fresh out of the oven. I am so happy I finally learned to make that pizza. It tasted so good and felt so good because through the Sicilian complaining love was kneaded into that dough.
    On pizza day love was learned. And over fried eggplant Rocco said it best, "The only way you show your love is through the stomach. Ultimately, its the stomach." Well said, Dad.

Thursday, September 24, 2009

APPLE CIDER DONUTS


     Fall is definitely my favorite season. The brisk air is nice and that fall foliage is super perdy, but what makes fall so delicious is Apple Cider Donuts!!! I had just bought an Apply Crisp and a bag of Apple Cider Donuts from Ritter's Cider Mill while taking a weekend trip with Charlie the Catahoula to the Pocono Mountains of PA. 
     Then the car broke down while I was at the dog run. Elaine, a lovely lady, drove me home. Picture this, Elaine and me, in her red mini cooper with the crazy Catahoula plus two 5 month old Labrador Puppies wrestling in the back. It was a tight and wild fit. For being my saviour Elaine got to take home that Apple Crisp, but I was left with nothing to eat but ALL of those Apple Cider Donuts. I am not complaining. They were a perfect breakfast and lunch until Rocco and Mommy came from Queens and picked me up. We picked up more on the way home, 18 in total, so apologies to all my friends who I am pushing the donuts on. Its just that if you don't help me, I WILL eat them all. They are so good. 
     Does anyone have any Apple Cider Donut recipes? I am a frying Queen and know I can handle this. Although it might be danger to know how.

Friday, September 18, 2009

MOZAREPPA - WTF!

    After a fun cyclones game, (I think they lost but they give out these crazy balloon bats everyone smacks together like maniacs) it was time to eat and on the boardwalk we spotted these strange things called mozzareppas. Its a mozarella cornmeal cake. I think I had enough GMOs for the day so I passed. Has anyone every had one of these suckers? They are probably delicious but not recognized by the body as actual food.

Saturday, September 12, 2009

Nonna's feeding tactics trait

    Lately I have noticed myself making a concerted effort to hold back on my force feeding tactics. I am the type of person who hates feeling like I am making someone do something they don't want to do, but when I ask, "Would you like a peach?" and the answer is "No," I can't help but want to come back with, "Are you sure?" In my mind I can't understand how someone could say no to a precious peach, and its my DNA (that Sicilian strand) that compels me to not take no for an answer. It takes everything I have to stop myself. No means no, thought and I can't be a food pusher.
     While I was at Nonna's the other day I figured out where I get it from.
     "You hungry Jane (my name is Jen)? You want something to eat?"
     "No thanks, Nonna. I just ate."
     "Jane, you sure?"
     "I'm okay."
     There she pauses. She is not satisfied with my responses. By the furrow in her brow I can tell she is thinking, planning her next move. She figures it out; her faces brightens up. She thinks she's slick.
     "Jane, you wanna just one meatball?"
      One meatball! She knows once you have one the next step is an entire bowl of pasta. And in Nonna's mind there is no turning down meatballs, plus just one cannot hurt. 
     "I'm fine, Nonna."
     "Jane, are you okay?"
     Its trip to the hospital worthy to turn down a meatball. That old Sicilian woman is just too much! I know where I get it from. I am going to really try hard not to be a food nagger. Its so hard though! One meatball!

Wednesday, July 8, 2009

AN IRISH FEAST

    Claire found this amazing photo of her mother Claire from maybe the late 60s early 70s. The resemblance between mother and daughter is uncanny. And while Claire's mom is a gorgeous feast for the eyes, I can't help but drool over the spread! What is even on that table? I can make out 4 stacks of bread, some ham and other varieties of rolled cold cuts, all types of mayo salads, a gigantic cake and asparagus with chocolate tips? I think its a sandwich party.

Monday, July 6, 2009

SICILIAN HAND GESTURES: PART 2

    After this "series" of photographs, I am convinced that my Nonna is a cartoon character. I really have to give Mommy credit for getting Nonna on a crazy rant about Josephine, her daily caretaker. Josephine is a really nice, middle aged, round and a bit pushy Sicilian woman (that explains the pushiness) who probably doesn't have a lot of game. But in Nonna's mind, which doesn't always line up with reality, Josephine is in fact a big time player. I should note that Josephine deserves sainthood for putting up with Nonna's antics. Nonna thinks that Mr. Columbo, the old fruit man, who has the personality of a zucchini has a thing for Josephine, whom Nonna has personally witnessed flaunting it while browsing his produce. That last statement can be read lewdly, so I am leaving it just how it is. Nonna has nothing to do all day but stew about every single thing that Josephine says and does and she has no problem telling you these stories over and over, even when there is a likelihood Josephine can hear, which is very uncomfortable. Its like her own living soap opera, episodes replaying in Nonna's head. She also thinks that Josephine has the hots for the doctor, whose name is, not kidding, Dr. Stallone. Now Nonna has become very secretive about her calls and visits to the doctor to prevent Josephine from getting her hands on him. 
    Mommy and I can't quite remember exactly what Nonna was on a tirade about during this sequence, but it was definitely one of the two forbidden love affairs she created in her Sicilian brain about Josephine. Next time I will make sure to get sound bites. 

     Here, Nonna is doing a 2 part hand gesture. The first obvious, "to the moon" or hitler impersonation, is Nonna expressing "get out of here with your crazy self" because she is outraged by Josephine's seemingly loose behavior. The second more subtle aspect of this Sicilian hand gesture is, if you look closely, Nonna is giving the horns or "fare le corna." 
    Giving the horns has two meanings. First it wards off bad luck.  When someone dies you give the horns. Rocco can be seen giving the horns while riding by cemeteries, which are plentiful in Queens. Makes sense. Giving the horns is also an insult to a man who is being cuckolded, and that man is called a "cornuto." You do not want to be called a cornuto; its very embarassing. Maybe here Nonna is referring to Josephine's boyfriend, whom Josephine is "cheating on" in Nonna's mind with either the fruit man or the doctor.

Thursday, June 4, 2009

GARLIC BREATH SOLUTION?

   Do you get garlic breath? I sure do, especially with raw garlic. Have you noticed that little stem in the middle of the garlic clove? Nonna told me that if you remove the stem before cooking you don't get garlic breath. Has anyone ever heard this? I asked Rocco and he explained the stems means the garlic has reached its growing phase and the stem is bitter but removing it won't take away garlic breath, cooking the garlic will. Now that I started removing it, and proceeding to eat entire cloves of cooked garlic, I don't seem to have garlic breath that I am aware of. Mike? I can't hang with raw garlic on its own anyway (I tried to eat a whole raw clove once and puked) and whenever its in salsa raw, while irresistibly delicious, it definitely causes breath havoc. I will try to remove the little stem with raw garlic in salsa or guacamole and compare.
   Also, I am severely susceptible to onion breath when I eat raw onions and even more so when they are caramelized, like on a Philly Cheese Steak. Its like I am an onion breathing dragon and I can't get away from myself. Its like the onion is in my lungs and apparently thats because it is. After those stinky molecules are digested they float around your blood and end up in your lungs, and the onions are actually exhaled from your lungs for 1 to 2 days. Crazy! Does anyone else have this experience? Any onion breath solutions? I just can't stop myself. 

Monday, May 18, 2009

I GOTTA THE SUGAH...

Nonna always tells me, "Jen, I gotta the sugah." She is saying she has "the sugar," pronounced shoo-guh, meaning she has diabetes. Nonna doesn't have diabetes, but in her off-kilter Sicilian mind filled with hypochondriac worry she does have "the sugar," among other Sicilian conditions like "the pressure" (high blood pressure) pronounced pre-sha and everyone knows this one, "the agida" (heartburn) pronounced ah-gee-duh. Nonna was so convinced she had the sugar that she demanded the doctor give her a skin prick diabetes sugar testing kit, which can only be obtained with a prescription. The doctor, knowing she didn't have diabetes refused, so Nonna threatened to go to another doctor, and he caved and gave it to her. This is why our healthcare is so screwed up!  Now Nonna follows cannoli eating with sugar monitoring and she is very pleased. She is also convinced that other people have the sugar, like my father, who doesn't have the sugar. But her friend across the street, Mrs. Lombardo, who is the strongest most hearty old woman I have ever met, (Ex. She is ninety and moved my refrigerator when I lived downstairs from Nonna.), according to Nonna, "Mrs. Lomardo really has gotta the sugah." And Mrs. Lombardo is in fact diabetic but it does not stop her from eating cannolis, either. I guess there is a difference between having the sugar and really having the sugar.  "I gotta the sugah," just means you are worried you might get the sugar. 

Sunday, May 17, 2009

Don't make the mala figura!

Mala Figura (mah-luh-fig-ooh-da) is an Italian phrase that I asked Rocco to define:

"Carissima,
First of all the term is mala figura. 
This is really a very central theme in Italian culture. A culture that has many "external" features i.e appearances or how things seem from the perspective of others.
The easiest way to translate it is "bad appearance." Something that should be avoided at all cost lest one is taken for a "cafone."
As an example, if you invite people over and realize that there is not enough dessert or if you go visit someone and do not bring enough dessert. If you go to a wedding and you realize that you have not put  enough cash in the "busta." Going to a function and being under dressed or over dressed is a mala figura as is driving a old Cadillac. 
Italians like to impress others, it's in their blood, it's part of the fact that the whole national ethos requires acting. A nation of actors upon a stage.
Whatever you do, never make a mala figura. If you invite people, always make food for an army and when you dress, always wear the best clothing etc. or else you will indeed make a mala figura.
You get the picture.
Love
YD"